forget those resolutions. let's call them goals and focus on the process rather than how long th
We have a tradition in the Gardner household. Every year on New Years Day, Jordan whips up the tastiest batch of Black Eyed Pea soup and then we sit down and write out our goals for the upcoming year. I tend to shy away from the word 'resolution' because I think it has gotten a bad rap over the years for roughly translating to 'the thing you want to do to be better and happier but will forget about in approximately 5 weeks'.
So we call them goals. We set individual ones and then family ones. And we write them down. Yes, on paper. There is no set number of goals - just however many we need. When we are finished we hang them on the fridge for all (but primarily the two of us) to see.
So why go through the hassle? Well, our resolutions from last year are still up, and I am proud to say I've accomplished 4 out of 6 of the personal ones and 5 out of 6 of the family ones. It's not the actual goals that are most important (although they are a crucial part of this whole thing), it's the PROCESS.
Sitting down with your partner, your dog, or by yourself and reflecting on the past year. What went well, what you could improve on, what habits you want to change or which ones you want to add to make yourself a little bit better. It's therapeutic and it's powerful annnnddd maybe you all have partners who love sitting down and taking a hard look at their internal happiness, but mine doesn't love all that emotional crap so this is a special DESIGNATED time for us to do it.
This year I've decided to share a few of my 2018 goals with the world (a little more public than displaying them on the refrigerator), created earlier than usual in hopes that you'll be inspired to write down a few of your own tonight.
1) Get out and do fun activities with Ava
E X P L A N A T I O N
Yes, we spent the last three months galavanting around San Francisco, but before that, when I was breastfeeding every couple of hours and putting Ava down for 4-5 naps each day, we didn't get out much. And I'm that type-A personality that gets super pent up and anxious if I'm in the house for too long! So this three month trip has been a really nice 'training ground' for me to get used to toting the little miss around, missing a nap here or there, and giving Ava some fun experiences she definitely wouldn't have gotten at home. Now it's time to bring this healthy habit back home to LA!
G A M E P L A N
Weekly baby music class that starts in January, aquariums, play dates, discovery cube in orange county, libraries, picnics in the park, indoor playgrounds, etc. They are all on my list and I'm excited to see our little girl continue to grow and discover the world (while I get out of the house and enjoy the company of other adults and their cutie kids!).
2) Two words: Self. Care.
E X P L A N A T I O N
Us mamas spend so much time taking care of everyone else, it is really easy to forget about ourselves. Take that three minute military-style shower so you can start that load of laundry, eat lunch and finish that last blog post before the baby wakes up... you know how it goes! So this year I am making ME a priority, and taking as good of care of myself, as I do the other people in my life.
G A M E P L A N
Mental: Gratitude journal -- giving myself the space to reflect on the day and just have that time set aside each night for me to unwind and journal.
Physical: I recently partnered with OSEA Malibu, an amazing natural skin-care company (organic, vegan, non-toxic -- basically all of the good things you want your skin care products to be). These people have been in the all-natural-high-quility-ingredient game, well before vegan was in vogue. In fact, this natural line was sold at the day spa I worked at, way back in high school!
So I'm super excited to incorporate three of my new favorite products in my 2018 Self-Care Regimen. First up, the White Algae Mask. Maybe it's the girly-girl in me, but nothing screams 'ME TIME' like a face mask. This stuff feels so nice going on -- with a little bit of fine exfoliation. And when it dries, it doesn't feel like you have mud caked on your face (yikes), so you can actually continue getting ready for the day (or winding down at night) which I really like. After just a few times using it, I already feel like I see a difference in my complexion. My skin tends to get a little blotchy and I'm stoked to have something I can use a couple times a week to correct that, while having a much-needed break from baby drool and diaper changes.
I also started using Undaria Body Polish (at the tail-end of my shower) for a weekly exfoliation -- then I moisturize with Undaria Algae Oil when I get out! *Pro-tip: Undaria is a brown marine algae (all of their products are seaweed based) that minimizes redness and also helps with fine-lines/wrinkles. Yep, count me in! These two steps don't add much time to my routine, but they do make me feel like I'm taking good care of myself, and that's what 2018 is going to be all about!
White Algae Mask | Undaria Body Polish and Algae Oil *It looks like the set is sold out as I write this, but you can buy them separately.
3) Create my mom-tribe
E X P L A N A T I O N
I feel really lucky to have so many awesome new mamas in my life. My friends, siblings and cousins are starting to have kids, and my neighbors-turned-friends all have little ones too. BUT life gets busy (as it tends to do) and it's very easy to let weeks and then months pass by without getting a play date on the calendar. This year, I'm getting those play dates scheduled, and I'm assembling my local mom-tribe.
G A M E P L A N
Whether it be a group text or an organized meet-up, I want to start planning trips to fun places and inviting all my local mamas to join. I started a little book club with the gals in my neighborhood a few months back and it was so worth the 30 minutes it took to make the flyer - to build a nice sense of camaraderie in the neighborhood. This year I will be doing a lot more of THAT!
4) Start spinning again + go run and hike in pretty places
E X P L A N A T I O N
I love spin class. I did it all throughout my pregnancy, but after little Ava was born, this fun hobby got pushed to the side because a gym class with a nursing baby at home just isn't a reality! Well now that she is older I want to get back into it -- and also start running with the stroller and hiking with the baby carrier!
G A M E P L A N
LA Fitness' Kids Club... its only $10 more each month and their CPR certified babysitters will play with my easy-to-please baby while I dust off the ol' spin shoes! In addition, because there are so many great places in Los Angeles and Orange County to run and hike, I fully intend to call on that mom-tribe to join me as I enjoy the great outdoors while getting a nice workout in!
The beauty of these goals is they might not all 'stick' and that is okay. In fact I think it's really healthy to go into your goal setting with realistic expectations of yourself. You are reflecting, goal setting, enjoying the process and working on some self-improvement. Even if you only accomplish 1 out of 6 goals, you will still be BETTER than you were the year before, so that is a very positive outcome in my mind. So what are you waiting for? Grab that pen and paper, and start creating those goals for your most awesome year yet!
Photos by Carleen Lana
